A week ago, I had a dream in which I was digging for gold. I sank the shovel into the soil and dug until the metal hit the wooden box. Finally, after throwing away the last pile of dirt to the side, I looked back at the spot beneath me, only to find it filled once again. With a brief sigh, I squared my shoulders and started shoveling all over again. And again… and again.

There’s so much to learn!

I’ve officially finished my first official month as a teacher for the Department of Education of New York. In the last four weeks, I many mistakes and failed many…many times. It has been a roller-coaster of emotions all around, from adjusting to a new work-culture to managing and building working relationships, writing lesson plans, and preparing for anxiety enduring observations. And I must say, I underestimated the among of work I would end up taking home.

I came into this career, hoping to be an advocate, and I’ve already encountered opportunities to advocate for my students. On the same token, I have already met rock blocks, and it seems like the only way to learn is the process of failing miserably.

Thus my dream, I think it was a metaphor for how I’ve been feeling lately. As a first-year teacher, I had days when I felt like I was trying to take on too much all at once, but the desire to do my best for my students makes me feel guilty when I can’t perform or achieve what’s needed to help them succeed.